What's your sexual wellness regimen?
In a culture where sexual wellness is almost an afterthought, our Sexual Wellness Regimen is your personalized guide for taking your self-care game to the next level! Just like your skincare or hair care regimen, your sexual wellness regimen helps you to explore different ways to care for your incredible body, deepen your self-love practice, and prioritize your sexual wellness. If this all feels new and different for you, no worries.
*we got you!*
Let's get started with some key questions.
Let's get started with some key questions.
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How often do you check in on your body?
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We are calling this a regimen because just like you figured out that washing your hair every Sunday was the best thing you could have done for your life and learned what face washes and creams work best for your skin, we want to encourage you to keep that same energy when it comes to your sexual wellness. Your hair care or skincare regimen is a well thought out plan designed to improve or maintain your health. Let's imagine if we applied this same type of thinking to our sexual wellness. It might mean that you:
Get tested every 3 months (or whenever you have a new partner) so that you can be aware of what your body and your partner needs. Find free, fast, and confidential testing near you.
Schedule your annual wellness visit around your birthday so that you don't forget it. FYI, You should always prep for your annual wellness visit!
Do a self-chest exam when you're deep conditioning your hair or once a month a few days after your period is over. You can even do it your favorite songs like sex educator and breast cancer survivor Ericka Hart did!
Switch up your contraceptive method if side effects don't resolve itself after consulting with your doctor. Learn about all your birth control options.
Checking in on your body and having a sexual wellness regimen allows you to develop a personal relationship with the most important person in your life: you.
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Who is your go-to person to talk with about sexual wellness?
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We know in the age of “ask Dr. Google” many people are relying on the internet as their “go-to-person” for health-related information. While convenient, it turns out that the internet and Dr. Google aren’t actual people. All jokes aside, it's really important to identify a person in your life who you can sit with and have a supportive, informed, and trusted conversation. While we may be used to thinking about sexual wellness from the most-basic place of “how to have sex and not get pregnant”, we're here to remind you that it's so much more than that. It isn’t so comforting to ask Google what to do when you’re not having a good sexual experience with your new partner or you are unsure of how to confidently navigate your sex life. Identifying a person who can hold you in all of the complexity of your sexual life is what everyone needs and deserves. You don't have to go at it alone. This person could be your healthcare provider, your therapist, maybe even your best friend or a sibling. Whoever it is, make sure that it is a person that you could go to at any point if you have a question or need a comforting ear to listen.
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Who is your gynecologist and why?
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Art by Brittany Harris.
First, let's break down what a gynecologist is! Gynecology is the branch of medicine that focuses on the female reproductive system from puberty to adulthood. It represents most of the reproductive care you’ll receive during your lifetime. If you become pregnant, you’ll need to go to an obstetrician. Sometimes these roles are combined, Obstetrician/Gynecologist (OB/GYN).
Your gynecologist is responsible for anything dealing with the diagnosis, treatment, and care of the female reproductive system.
This includes the:
vagina
uterus
ovaries
fallopian tubes
This branch of medicine also includes screening for and treating issues associated with chest/breasts.
Gynecologists can address health concerns such as:
Fertility issues
Birth Control
Cancer prevention
Pain and discomfort during sexual intercourse
Sexually transmitted infections
So now that we know all that a GYN can do, let's talk about who you've chosen to take care of your reproductive system. Face it, we have specific reasons why no one but our go-to stylist can touch our hair. They know how to slay our hair and tend to our edges and they care about the health of our hair. Working with a health care provider should be no different. So, sis, we want to know — who is it and why?
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What are some ways you protect yourself sexually?
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Image of an internal condom (left) and external condom (right).
If you grew up in the 90s as we did, you probably heard some version of the “respect yourself, protect yourself” commercial encouraging you to use a condom on your next sexual encounter. It's 2020 and we're still trying to figure out what the "respect" part of this phrase was trying to imply. Anyway...what is your relationship with condoms? Do you use them regularly, frequently, with specific partners, or not at all? Do you prefer to use external condoms or internal condoms? If you don't use condoms, maybe your practice is to get tested regularly (what is regular for you?). Remember that condoms and getting tested are just two of the many forms of protection for your sexual wellness. What about other ways you protect your body, heart, spirit, mind in your sex life?
Simply put, we're asking what are your boundaries, sis? Where do you like to be touched? Do you communicate your expectations when you start having sex with someone? Do you want to know if they call after sex or will welcome your cuddles? Do you discuss the parts of your body that are off-limits or bodily fluids that should be deposited elsewhere? It’s a good idea to draw up a list of the ways you intend to protect yourself sexually which includes your health, your body, your spirit, and your heart.
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What are the sexual wellness products and routines you can not live without?
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So you know when you run out of your favorite conditioner and you just skip wash day completely because you didn’t have a chance to run to Target? Yeah, that’s what we mean by products and routines you cannot live without. Sexual wellness products are the physical (sometimes digital) products you incorporate into your sexual life. That could be your favorite condom brand or lube, or your favorite adult toy and batteries or massage oil. This could also be your favorite Savage Fenty set or matching bra and panties from Third Love or Nubian Skin. In terms of routines: What are your favorite sexual positions, must-haves, or things you want to try? This could also be a routine like showers or peeing directly after sex (we should all do that by the way!)We created a list of some of our favorite black-owned sexual wellness brands so you can get started with your list!
CREATE YOUR SEXUAL WELLNESS REGIMEN!
Now that you've asked yourself a bunch of questions, you might be asking yourself, "what's next?".
A library of free resources so that you can feel good about making informed and unapologetic decisions about your sexual and reproductive health
Until next time,
